If I win the lotto tonight I will never ask to

To win the Lottery again. I hold two tickets in my hand for the 111 million jackpot. The last time I played was... three years ago in North Carolina. On my way home from a summer camping week, I stopped at a gas station. The man in front of me bought a ticket for the 120 million. I saw it as a sign. I spent the next six hours drive dreaming of how I spend the money. In my Days Inn room I watched the news. I lost.
Do you know the story of the guy who prayed to god every week to win the lottery. After years of prayer. God spoke... "Ok, Ok...stop nagging, at least buy a ticket."
I told this joke to my friend this week and tonight I had to run out to buy my last diet soda. (Tomorrow I am starting a juice fast). My bodega man was running tickets into the machine. It was a sign. The convo:
Heather: "Is the lotto tomorrow?"
Bodega Man: "Mega Million tonight"
Heather: "How much is it worth?"
BM: "one to eleven million"
Heather: "that's all, huh...what about tomorrow"
BM: "only 5 million"
Heather: "Did somebody win the 96 million from last week?"
BM: "Mami, nobody won, ess tonight. one hundred eleven million."

He showed me how to fill out the ticket. I bought two using my and my friends B-days. Now I am dreaming of what I will do.
The wish list:--Pay off Debts--Buy modest two bedroom Central Park West apt near Fairway.--Get my mother the best in hearing treatment.--Quit job and do medical mission trips. --Donate time and money to animals.--Take lots of singing and dancing classes. --Go to for masters in nursing and writing so I can teach nursing and be a better writer. --Audition and make short films.

Put the money in the bank and have my father manage it so I don't become one of those lotto winners who end up worse that they started off.
--Support mad scientist so my father can live forever.

A Chef, I'm a Chef

What is it about Thanksgiving, or any major holiday, that turns the average take-out fiend into a master chef. Or someone who thinks they are a master chef. There's something about the smell of cooking meat that makes one feel accomplished. In my case it was garlic and sun dried tomato. I created a veggie lasagna that won everyone over. Layers of yellow squash, zucchini, and eggplant nestled in between Fontina and Parmesan cheese. I took about two hours and I made my own pesto for the sauce.... Yummy! That's Chopped Broccoli and Sun dried tomatoes on the top. Beware of Over-cheesing, You'll pay in the morning.

Barry Manilow-Always the Punchline

Noise Violators Sentenced to Listen to Barry Manilow

A friend sent this to me, she knows I love Barry. One first glance at the Headline, I thought that he was the sole auditory punishment. In case of noise pollution, the judge forces the dammed into a room to here any music they don't like: Barry, Barney the Dinosaur, and the Platters.
Would rousing choruses of "I love you, you love me, were a happy family...." or "Oooh Mandy, well you came and you gave...." bring out the quiet lover in you?
Looks like it works for this small Colorado town.